The school I work at hosted Every Fifteen Minutes in 2016—I couldn’t believe the scale and scope. Your experience peeled back the curtain on the side of it I never knew. I did know the opposite vantage point: the reaper escorting out a student from my class put a lump in my throat. I’d like to think this is a program that yields positive influence, even if its approach isn’t research-endorsed optimal.
The “Why” of that desire to impress fascinates me. It’s great for spurring reflection; when we put the compulsion to words, it can be interrogated. As you noted (and nailed, I’d say), there are legitimate reasons to impress other people, but there are plenty of situations when that isn’t necessary. Legislating that line is surely helpful.
In any event, this was thoughtful about a big idea but constructed around a meaningful personal experience—that’s my favorite thing to read. It’s a wonderful piece. Thanks for sharing it.
Michael! This is so incredibly kind; thank you for making my day. I'm really glad I could turn what has ultimately been a long and tangled personal thread into something that inspires reflection in others. :)
It's so fascinating to hear that you were on the other side of the Every 15 Minutes experience! I've never heard from someone who helped facilitate it before, and I can only imagine how difficult it was to escort students out of class, even when you knew it was all fiction. Just goes to show how easily we can impress a certain theme upon our brains.
Thank you again for reading and leaving such kind words!
This is it, people!!!! This is the best Creativity Under Capitalism post so far!!!! I'm honored to have writer friends like Adrianna. If you want to feel shocked and understood and validated today, read this.
I love this piece on so many levels. First of all, the insanity of the drunk driving intervention. I have so many questions! Not ones you have to answer, but just rhetorically, where and when was this and would it still happen today? Did someone do research to determine whether it was actually effective, and importantly, what other kind of positive or negative side effects it could have caused? Then there’s the story of what it did for your personality. Wow. To be transformed like that at such a young age! At over 40, I’m still learning that not everyone has their shit together (and I’m convinced that I know people who actually do). The last thing that jumped out at me is how hard you have been working to keep up the facade of effortless extrovert. I bet the impression you are making is absolutely flawless, and the self-flagellation afterwards is totally invisible to others. Oh how we make ourselves suffer!
I apologize for the stream of consciousness response. This piece made a huge impression on me!
This is SO sweet, I'll take your stream of consciousness any time!!!
This was in 2013, I believe (I graduated high school in 2014). And it was in southern California. My graduating class was fairly large (1,000 students) so I'm guessing a much smaller high school wouldn't have invested all this money and time into putting on such an intense program, but who knows!
Your point about the program's effectiveness is interesting, because I remember reading a year or two afterward that fear-based deterrence is not the most effective way to prevent people from doing something harmful. I still think the program is valuable because 1) it probably does scare SOME kids out of making dumb choices, at least for a while 2) it got us out of class for a couple days lol and 3) clearly it helped me, albeit in a way it was never intended to. But, yeah, the resources invested into this kind of thing (we had a funeral home tour??? a mock car crash??? it was insane) prob aren't worth it.
Also, I've said for a long time that if I could have a little fairy on my shoulder reassure me after every social interaction, I would take it in a heartbeat. Your "I bet the impression you are making is absolutely flawless" is the next best thing. Thanks, Jude :)
New on Substack, just stumbled on this piece, reminds me a bit of a "cult weekend" I went on with the JTC (junior temple club) in 9th grade. Only we Gen X youngins weren't told what it was about, just treated like new cult members till later in the weekend when we were shown a documentary on the danger of cults. It made me mistrust institutions (including religion) even more. Stayed shy & awkward till I "went out" with a few boys. 😉
I love this so much. Conformity tends to be so ingrained in us as a survival trait, that it’s hard to forget that we don’t actually need to be everyone we meet’s favorite/dream boy/girl. Just yesterday, I found myself dressing “cool” for a local concert to impress my roommates’ friends who were also going, but then not actually having anything to talk to them about once I got there. It’s so ridiculous to want to impress every single person we meet. Anyway, I loved your essay!
Oh my god, I can relate to this. "Ridiculous" is the best word to describe it - how is it worth any of our time/energy to work SO hard to make sure everyone we meet not only thinks we're kind and polite, but also cool and interesting and "with it" etc? It's exhausting.
I loved this! I also hate the term people pleaser and never resonated with it but then realized more recently there's a level of needing acceptance or to be seen a certain way. The macabre drunk driving program actually seems so...good? Lol thanks for sharing. It was an interesting program!
Aw, thank you! Haha, I'm glad I'm not the only one who's sorta turned off by the term - though I definitely understand how people come to resonate with it. And Every 15 Minutes was definitely VERY fascinating to experience - just a little stomach ache inducing sometimes :)
Oh I do love your reflective mind. I think that being “ourself” and “authentic” implies that we are one-note social creatures that don’t adapt to the situations we’re in. Like, I am a very different person working with small children than I am on Substack— is one self less authentic than the other? I think this is particularly interesting to explore within the context of internet culture where people are often more outgoing than they might be in real life. I appreciate you considering why you do things, and I definitely think that’s a practice I need to integrate into my own life, as I am 100% a recovering people pleaser and perfectionist.
Also my jaw dropped reading about the 15 minutes intervention. I love how it brought you a moment of reflection but AS A TEACHER HOLY SHIT WHAT THE HELL? I can’t imagine that flying nowadays (does that program still run??????????)
I fully feel you on this! I've never liked the accusation that a person is "fake" because they change their behavior slightly from person to person or situation to situation. I think the difference here is me realizing that I'm pretty much constantly pushing myself to act like someone I am not and/or don't care to be, rather than simply adapting my personality to fit the expectations of a given social situation. (I know that some neurodivergent folks call this "masking," but I'm not sure it's appropriate to use with myself - regardless, I can definitely see where those people are coming from, and it's exhausting.)
And lmaooooooo YEAH DUDE I just googled it and there are videos of this same program taking place at other high schools in California. (The California Highway Patrol is heavily involved/a main sponsor.) I can't speak for anyone who's gone to high school in the past decade obviously, but when I was in school, kids wanted to be a part of it. It felt special and different, I guess 🤪
You're asking yourself questions I wish I'd asked myself 25 years ago. Keep asking those questions and working towards the answers, because it's even less fun to puzzle through it at 49 ❤️
Amazing! Both the crazy Every 15 Minutes thing your school did, and the fact you described ME as you were describing you (though I didn't make many of these connections about myself until my mid-20's. Thank you for writing this!!!
This was fantastic to read.
The school I work at hosted Every Fifteen Minutes in 2016—I couldn’t believe the scale and scope. Your experience peeled back the curtain on the side of it I never knew. I did know the opposite vantage point: the reaper escorting out a student from my class put a lump in my throat. I’d like to think this is a program that yields positive influence, even if its approach isn’t research-endorsed optimal.
The “Why” of that desire to impress fascinates me. It’s great for spurring reflection; when we put the compulsion to words, it can be interrogated. As you noted (and nailed, I’d say), there are legitimate reasons to impress other people, but there are plenty of situations when that isn’t necessary. Legislating that line is surely helpful.
In any event, this was thoughtful about a big idea but constructed around a meaningful personal experience—that’s my favorite thing to read. It’s a wonderful piece. Thanks for sharing it.
Michael! This is so incredibly kind; thank you for making my day. I'm really glad I could turn what has ultimately been a long and tangled personal thread into something that inspires reflection in others. :)
It's so fascinating to hear that you were on the other side of the Every 15 Minutes experience! I've never heard from someone who helped facilitate it before, and I can only imagine how difficult it was to escort students out of class, even when you knew it was all fiction. Just goes to show how easily we can impress a certain theme upon our brains.
Thank you again for reading and leaving such kind words!
This is it, people!!!! This is the best Creativity Under Capitalism post so far!!!! I'm honored to have writer friends like Adrianna. If you want to feel shocked and understood and validated today, read this.
I love this piece on so many levels. First of all, the insanity of the drunk driving intervention. I have so many questions! Not ones you have to answer, but just rhetorically, where and when was this and would it still happen today? Did someone do research to determine whether it was actually effective, and importantly, what other kind of positive or negative side effects it could have caused? Then there’s the story of what it did for your personality. Wow. To be transformed like that at such a young age! At over 40, I’m still learning that not everyone has their shit together (and I’m convinced that I know people who actually do). The last thing that jumped out at me is how hard you have been working to keep up the facade of effortless extrovert. I bet the impression you are making is absolutely flawless, and the self-flagellation afterwards is totally invisible to others. Oh how we make ourselves suffer!
I apologize for the stream of consciousness response. This piece made a huge impression on me!
This is SO sweet, I'll take your stream of consciousness any time!!!
This was in 2013, I believe (I graduated high school in 2014). And it was in southern California. My graduating class was fairly large (1,000 students) so I'm guessing a much smaller high school wouldn't have invested all this money and time into putting on such an intense program, but who knows!
Your point about the program's effectiveness is interesting, because I remember reading a year or two afterward that fear-based deterrence is not the most effective way to prevent people from doing something harmful. I still think the program is valuable because 1) it probably does scare SOME kids out of making dumb choices, at least for a while 2) it got us out of class for a couple days lol and 3) clearly it helped me, albeit in a way it was never intended to. But, yeah, the resources invested into this kind of thing (we had a funeral home tour??? a mock car crash??? it was insane) prob aren't worth it.
Also, I've said for a long time that if I could have a little fairy on my shoulder reassure me after every social interaction, I would take it in a heartbeat. Your "I bet the impression you are making is absolutely flawless" is the next best thing. Thanks, Jude :)
New on Substack, just stumbled on this piece, reminds me a bit of a "cult weekend" I went on with the JTC (junior temple club) in 9th grade. Only we Gen X youngins weren't told what it was about, just treated like new cult members till later in the weekend when we were shown a documentary on the danger of cults. It made me mistrust institutions (including religion) even more. Stayed shy & awkward till I "went out" with a few boys. 😉
WHOA! This is a fascinating concept - I'd love to read more about it, if you ever write an essay on it or anything. Thanks for sharing! And welcome :)
Hmmm, maybe I will via my lens of astrology & poetry. Stay tuned....
I love this so much. Conformity tends to be so ingrained in us as a survival trait, that it’s hard to forget that we don’t actually need to be everyone we meet’s favorite/dream boy/girl. Just yesterday, I found myself dressing “cool” for a local concert to impress my roommates’ friends who were also going, but then not actually having anything to talk to them about once I got there. It’s so ridiculous to want to impress every single person we meet. Anyway, I loved your essay!
Oh my god, I can relate to this. "Ridiculous" is the best word to describe it - how is it worth any of our time/energy to work SO hard to make sure everyone we meet not only thinks we're kind and polite, but also cool and interesting and "with it" etc? It's exhausting.
I loved this! I also hate the term people pleaser and never resonated with it but then realized more recently there's a level of needing acceptance or to be seen a certain way. The macabre drunk driving program actually seems so...good? Lol thanks for sharing. It was an interesting program!
Aw, thank you! Haha, I'm glad I'm not the only one who's sorta turned off by the term - though I definitely understand how people come to resonate with it. And Every 15 Minutes was definitely VERY fascinating to experience - just a little stomach ache inducing sometimes :)
Oh I do love your reflective mind. I think that being “ourself” and “authentic” implies that we are one-note social creatures that don’t adapt to the situations we’re in. Like, I am a very different person working with small children than I am on Substack— is one self less authentic than the other? I think this is particularly interesting to explore within the context of internet culture where people are often more outgoing than they might be in real life. I appreciate you considering why you do things, and I definitely think that’s a practice I need to integrate into my own life, as I am 100% a recovering people pleaser and perfectionist.
Also my jaw dropped reading about the 15 minutes intervention. I love how it brought you a moment of reflection but AS A TEACHER HOLY SHIT WHAT THE HELL? I can’t imagine that flying nowadays (does that program still run??????????)
I fully feel you on this! I've never liked the accusation that a person is "fake" because they change their behavior slightly from person to person or situation to situation. I think the difference here is me realizing that I'm pretty much constantly pushing myself to act like someone I am not and/or don't care to be, rather than simply adapting my personality to fit the expectations of a given social situation. (I know that some neurodivergent folks call this "masking," but I'm not sure it's appropriate to use with myself - regardless, I can definitely see where those people are coming from, and it's exhausting.)
And lmaooooooo YEAH DUDE I just googled it and there are videos of this same program taking place at other high schools in California. (The California Highway Patrol is heavily involved/a main sponsor.) I can't speak for anyone who's gone to high school in the past decade obviously, but when I was in school, kids wanted to be a part of it. It felt special and different, I guess 🤪
You're asking yourself questions I wish I'd asked myself 25 years ago. Keep asking those questions and working towards the answers, because it's even less fun to puzzle through it at 49 ❤️
Amazing! Both the crazy Every 15 Minutes thing your school did, and the fact you described ME as you were describing you (though I didn't make many of these connections about myself until my mid-20's. Thank you for writing this!!!